Should I stay or should I go? [Guest post]

Jan 13

Written By Boris H

Street Wisdom host, Chuy Anaya, remembers his first transformative moment on a Street Wisdom Walkshop, when suddenly everything changed. Thank you Chuy for sharing this amazing story. Check out Chuy’s new Walkshops in Aguascalientes, Mexico!

Should I stay or should I go?

By Chuy Anaya

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift, and the rational mind its faithful servant.” – Albert Einstein

I remember September 27th, 2024, very clearly. I had signed up for a session of something called “Street Wisdom,” led by Tiffany at 10 a.m. That morning, I woke up and simply didn’t feel like doing anything. My energy and motivation were rock bottom. I even canceled my attendance at 9 AM, just an hour before it started.

At that point, I was going through one of the toughest periods of my life. Just a few weeks earlier, I had ended my relationship with someone I believed was my happily-ever-after. I didn’t have a place of my own, so I was staying temporarily at a friend’s apartment. My bank account was running on fumes. I didn’t have a job, nor the slightest idea of what my future would look like.

To add more pressure to the mix, I was taking some demanding classes—Advanced Finance, Operations Management, and Law—while also serving as Vice President of the student association. If that period had been a dish, it would have been a bowl of wasabi soup with habaneros.

I no longer knew what I wanted in my life. I felt like an abandoned sailboat caught in the middle of a hurricane, just trying to stay afloat. My MBA was ending in a few months, and the million-dollar question kept echoing in my mind: should I stay, or should I go?

* * * * *

Stay in Canada… or return to Mexico?

I went back mentally to the months before I left my home in Mexico, reflecting on the reasons I had packed my bags and moved to Alberta in the first place.

I had dreams of starting a new chapter with the love of my life in a developed country. I had also always wanted to study business; pursuing a master’s degree abroad felt like the perfect opportunity.

But things clearly didn’t unfold the way I expected.

Ending my relationship, seeing the country go through economic uncertainty, and witnessing the signs of deglobalization made me question whether staying in Canada still made sense. That triggered a long, exhausting debate between my mind and my heart.

Canada is an extraordinary country. Even in my darkest moments, I felt grateful to be in such a diverse and multicultural place—full of kind, empathetic people, safe streets, a stable economy, and a welcoming attitude toward immigrants. It had everything.

And yet… I couldn’t make it feel like home. All the positives I once held onto no longer made sense.

* * * * *

And… now?

I felt guilty, ungrateful, and even cowardly for even considering returning to Mexico. I was living the life many people back home dreamed of.

“Give it time. Reinvent yourself,” I kept telling myself.

But the truth was that the very thought of all the extra years, sacrifices, and uncertainty required just to stay in the country felt overwhelming. I felt like I was living a lie—pretending to be okay, pretending to be happy.

I was caught in that whirlwind of emotions when I canceled on Tiffany.

Ten minutes after canceling, I found myself standing in front of the bathroom mirror at my friend’s apartment.

“What are you going to do now? Cry?”

And then I heard a quiet voice inside me say, “Wipe your tears. Go… Maybe you’ll find an answer there.”

So, I went.

* * * * *

Wisdom in the subway

I showed up skeptical, with almost no expectations. I remember doing the three warm-up exercises meant to help you tune into your intuition:

Noticing what attracts you and what doesn’t
Slowing everything down
Trying to find the gentle side of things you normally dislike.

I did run into a few signs, but honestly, nothing felt meaningful:

An orange balloon hovering over Churchill Square for about 30 seconds before drifting suddenly south
Three homeless individuals listening to music, laughing, and hugging
Some angry graffiti complaining about the government and missing someone.

Up to that point, nothing felt like a message for me.

Then came the quest, the part where you walk through the streets holding a question in mind, letting the city guide you toward an answer.

My feet took me to a place I knew all too well: Churchill LRT Station.

* * * * *

Old place, new eyes

I had passed through that metro station literally hundreds of times on my way to the university.

But this time was different. I walked slowly, paying attention to people, textures, colors… searching for something I couldn’t describe.

Suddenly, a mural caught my eye: a large Indigenous healer guiding her community above the city of Edmonton. I stopped and stared at it for a few minutes.

Just as I was about to continue walking, I noticed the title: “Returning Home” — by Carla Rae Taylor and Dana Belcourt.

It hit me straight in the chest.

Woooooooow!

I had no words. I knew instantly. I didn’t need more signs, more symbolism, or anything else. In that moment, I finally understood what my intuition had been whispering for months: I wanted to go back home.

I didn’t need to reinvent myself. I needed to listen to myself.

I didn’t know exactly what my next steps would be, but I felt absolute certainty about my direction: I was going back to Mexico.

That certainty brought me so much peace. And from that moment on, the guilt disappeared.

* * * * *

Captain Chuy onboarded

As expected, in the months that followed many people asked about my post-MBA plans.

When I told them I planned to return home, most tried to convince me to stay—using the same arguments I had repeated to myself a thousand times before.

I listened with genuine interest, but nothing changed my mind.

That drifting sailboat finally had a captain and a compass.

Goi Nasu has a great phrase that resonates with me: “An entire sea of water can't sink a ship unless it gets inside of the ship.”

* * * * *

After the storm

Three months after that walk, everything began to shine again:

I was living in a dream apartment for any student: affordable, spacious, and close to campus.

I had a job, earned a scholarship, passed all my courses, started dating, and reconnected with friends.

I was enjoying life again—even though it wasn’t perfect; I got assaulted for the very first time in my life the week after that walk… but that’s a story for another day.

Actually, let me correct myself: I was enjoying life because it wasn’t perfect.

This practice helped me put an end to months of doubt and anxiety.

For the first time in a long while, I felt relief—and I could finally live plentifully again.

More than a year and a half after that September morning, and six months after finishing my program, I can say wholeheartedly:

Thank you, life!

Thank you, Canada!

Thank you, MBA!

And thank you, Tiffany and Street Wisdom!

* * * * *

Listen to your heart

As graduation approached and I calmly prepared to return home, I saw classmates in very different emotional states. Some were excited and fulfilled.

But others were confused, anxious about the future. Some because they had to return to their home countries, and others because they wanted to stay but couldn’t afford it after the MBA. Everybody had a world of options in front of them. Which option should each one choose?

There is not a universal single path to happiness, love, wisdom or success. Everyone has their own. But which way is your way? Figuring this out might be challenging.

I share my experience with Street Wisdom in the hope that it can help others find their own path.

Most might agree that following your heart is a good idea. The problem is that most of us don’t listen to it. Street Wisdom proves that you can listen to it—even in the middle of a chaotic street—if you are open to the signs of life and present in the moment.

Street Wisdom taught me to be loyal to myself and to trust my intuition—even when the path doesn’t look logical from the outside or to others. That simple yet powerful lesson made every dollar, and every drop of blood, sweat, and tears over those two years absolutely worth it.

* * * * *

What’s Street Wisdom again?

Street Wisdom is a creative practice you add to your everyday walk, and we share it every week for FREE in our online and in-person Walkshops.

Very simply put, you take a question for a walk to help you find fresh inspiration. We believe answers are everywhere, all around us, especially when we’re tuned in to our environment. Your question can be about anything - life or work or love or community or the planet or everything in between. Anything you want some fresh inspiration for.

It might be…

A question about work - What’s my next product innovation? How can I best lead my team? How can I achieve more with less energy?
A question about life - What should my next hobby be? How can I meet new people? What don’t I know already? Which of my values do I want to explore more?
A question about love - Should I stay with my partner? Should we move to another city? How can I bring all of me to my relationship?
A question about community - How can I best support my local neighbourhood? What’s being called of me in my local area? How can I meet people who don’t share my opinions?
A question about the planet - What do I need to do to help nature flourish? Which volunteering projects shall I contribute to? What does the planet want me to do next?
A question about… [ANYTHING!] - Street Wisdom works for practically any question. We simply suggest you make it as simple as possible (could your 11 year old self understand it?) and it’s often nice to put it in the third person eg “What are [insert your name]’s next steps with the job?” Putting it in the third person helps give you a bit of perspective.

The idea is, once you have your question, that you take it for a walk and - once you’ve tuned in to the world around you through our easy three-part process (which you learn on a FREE Walkshop) - the streets send you fresh answers that directly relate to your question through signs and signals as you wander. You might find you:

Walk down a dead-end street - and realise you’re in a professional or personal cul-de-sac
Hit a roundabout - and realise you’ve got a decision to make and so many options (which one will you take?)
Look up! - and realise you’re trapped in the everyday detail and need to see the bigger picture more
See a curve ahead - and realise you want to preview the future (what’s exciting or alive-making or scary round the corner?)
Reach a fork in the road - and have to decide which option to take. Now’s the time!

Suddenly, the world is rich with meaningful sounds, sights, images, patterns, words, posters, overheard conversations, colours, animals, birds, nature, cloud formations (looking up is great!) - all kinds of things.

The world is there for you, if you keep your mind and heart open!

Try it right now!

This curious practice we’ve developed and refined over the last 15 years is backed by the latest mindfulness, neuroscience, creativity and wellness theory.

To give it a go right now, you can try our five-minute taster, or sign up for an online or in-person Walkshop (yes, walking workshop!) to practise it fully. Once you’ve learned it, you’ve got a skill for life!

Fancy becoming a Street Wisdom host?

It’s really rewarding becoming a Street Wisdom host, bringing strangers together to connect, helping people become more playful, sharing everyday wonder in your local neighbourhood, and giving people a practice and a skill they can enjoy for life!

What does it involve?

Being a Street Wisdom host involves as much or as little as you want it to. Many hosts lead one or two Walkshops a year in their neighbourhood. Some host more, including weekly Walkshops. To become a Street Wisdom Host in your area, get in touch with us at contactus@streetwisdom.org.

Finally, don’t forget

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So get offline, get off your phone, get off on the wonder all around. You deserve it, and the world does too!