Although I’ve run several Street Wisdom events, I’ve not yet facilitated one with a specific focus. So it was interesting to go along to the event this week run by Hilary Gallo. We started with a discussion on fear and then approached the Fear Wall to write up our particular fears. The two that seemed to come up most were ‘loneliness’ and ‘not being good enough’.
The latter was the one I was going with, and specifically about my new website not being good enough. In fact, I’d got to the point of needing feedback on it, but was fearful of the responses I would get. I know. It doesn’t even make sense, right? So, it was well worth spending some time thinking about how I could overcome that belief.
Despite the bad weather, I had a lovely time exploring the area – I’ve never wandered the area behind Regent Street. Not much was making sense, but I know to trust the process and keep going. I stopped in a jeweller’s shop, where in the back room they made Goth rings – scary stuff like skulls made into beautiful jewellery. And, right at the end, I walked past Hamleys and saw two buskers dressed as pirates (a female pirate dress in a dress was a new take on the subject!). They were dancing to some very jolly music and it was all a bit of a laugh. And with the laugh came the realisation that what could be very scary, hooks for hands and so on, is made much less scary for kids by making it cartoonish and child-like. And I like the link to the skulls too.
So … fears can be made beautiful and fun. Who knew?
In the sharing afterwards, I concluded that I could use this by working on making my fear a bit sillier and funnier. I went off to meet a friend and, I confess, thought no more of it.
However, three days later I was working on the website (I hope it’s nearly the final edit, by the way) and my beloved came into the room. Without really thinking about it at all I asked him whether he wanted to take a look. I think we both took a bit of a deep breath and he looked through it … and pronounced he liked it.
Given that he can be a very ‘direct’ critic sometimes, I was chuffed to pieces. I really value his opinion on the pictures, particularly, as I had agonised over them for far too long and he has a good artistic eye.
There’s no direct connection. I didn’t remember the pirates when I opened the site up for feedback. But I’m sure they’ve been dancing away in the background. I’ve now done a little pirate dance myself and am working on a pirate song. So, pirates will now be my companions as I explore my fears. I’m undoubtedly going to be facing some this year … but now I’ll be approaching them in a piratical way.
(As a PS – I shared my reflections to my Reflective Practice group. Turns out the female pirate is the niece of one of the members. I love that synchronicity.)
by Jane Parslow